Cragin XXII
July 8, 2006
Thanks to Mike Zielinski for sending in the score sheet. Scores can be found here. The truth is out!
And a big Cragin Thanks to Dan Zielinski for this year's photos!
"The Cragin" is a nice sounding name for our small little tournament. For 31 years until the brief lackacourse attack we met to renew friendship laughter and tears over our golf games. (lackacourse attack, by the way, is of no relation to the dread Hawaiian disease of lackanookie which at many of our ages is prevalent)
So, last year when we got booted off of our old home course at Hunter, well, maybe burned out, or shut down, or whatever you want to call it, we didn't get to meet and renew and all that fraternal, familial stuff we do. The spirit of Cragin, however, is not something that can easily be kept down or forgotten. Just ask Jimmy Zielinski, who returned this year and for the umptillionth time related his bit of baseball trivia that Tim Mocarski hit the longest homerun in baseball history right there at the back lot of Prosser High School, well at least the longest whiffle ball homer hit in Prosser High School back lot history when he clocked a floating fast ball one-armed with a two foot long plastic bat into a 40 mph wind over Jimmy's head and into the parking lot a half mile away from the diamond. Well, at least that's how Jimmy tells it. Tim doesn't remember anything about the Prosser games expect running into a wall to make a catch on a deep fly of the bat of Sparr, but that was in a fast pitch game with rubber balls and slightly bigger, wooden bats.
The Cragin returned this year to Bristol Oaks Country Club in Bristol, Wisconsin. We were going to perhaps call this year's tournament, "The Cragin Returns"or maybe "The Return of the Cragin,"� but both of those names sounded too much like bad sequels to B monster movies. Are they any A monster movies anymore? Okay, maybe Frankenstein and Godzilla and King Kong, but those are classics. And maybe Alien if for nothing else but that T-shirt scene with Sigourney Weaver at the end. Okay, maybe, too, the Cragin can be called a monster show based on most of our swings.
Moe insisted he was not on steroids after having won the longest drive umbrella. He did offer to submit to testing, but then remembered that czardnina and pierogi sometimes produce positive drug results. He beat out Len Tobiaski by a mere foot. Must be that melon head driver he got last year. Tobiaski had the last laugh by beating Moe by one stroke 83-84.
Moe also was in the running for closest to the pin on the 8th hole. That honor and another umbrella, however, went to ... well, to be honest, Moe doesn't remember since he was still bummed out from having to take four shots to get in the hole from five yards off the green on a par ... twice in the same round!
Moe and Tobie were third in the gross scores this year. Tom Zielinski, who looks nothing like Tom Selleck, shot a blistering 37 on the front nine, cooled off on the back nine and finished with low gross of 80. Nobody asked him to take any drug test, though.
Rich Wojnicki took home the traveling trophy with a low net of 72. Either the handicap system was working perfectly this year or simply Dennis didn't pick the right holes that produced the ridiculously low numbers of past years. Speaking of Dennis, the co-founder of the tournament, was missing in action. Rumor has it that he was under the weather after practicing too much for this year's tournament.
Ever mindful of equal rights and opportunity for everyone, the Cragin once again had a women's division, but it was not hotly contested this year as we had only three female entrants. Jackie Zielinski won low gross and Gail Zielinski won Low Net. When asked if the golfer on her trophy was a woman, Gregg Rossi copped a feel of the trophy and assured us all that it was indeed a female figure. "And she's wearing a very short skirt, too!"� he said. Typical perverts, we men can be sometimes. The women at the table understood this and simply rolled their eyes in that all-knowing look of "We know our Cragin men!"�
Mike Zielinski did an admirable job of filling in for his dad at the presentations of awards and trophies. Every loser, which meant just about everybody, got a hat. Besides the Closest to the Pin and the Longest Drive, the trophy winners also got an umbrella. The trophies were different this year and several people remarked that the golfer on the Low Gross trophy was a remarkable likeness to Dennis, particularly the wrinkled plus fours the guy was wearing. Payne Stewart never looked that bad!
Mike's wife is expecting the first Zielinski grandchild in August. With that, his doctor job, and the side gig of his band Powerknobs (ranked 193,535 on Amazon sales), his golf game showed it. He does say, like most of us these days, that he made the right choice in not becoming a pro golfer.
Moe held off on farting until the 18th green. His playing partners were grateful.
As always, the 2006 Cragin provided us with fun, laughter, and the fellowship of the past and present. Ken Mrock showed up after a few years away of taking care of the grounds for the Bears. He wore a Bears shirt to the tournament, though, and was almost charged double for his green fees by the Packer fan behind the counter. Although he didn't play, Gregg Rossi showed up for the food. He's awaiting surgery in August. Bob Ziaja and his kids and their spouses showed up. The usual Zielinski contingent played, too. Larry the Leach, Woj, Mrock, Moe, Spar, Len and any others I missed here. The usual suspects and Cragin miscreants. We missed some people and relished the ones there. We caught up on old times, with old friends and enjoyed ourselves. As always, the scores we shot didn't really matter. Being with each other did.
Bristol Oaks received great reviews from almost every participant this year, so we'll tee it up there again in 2007 on July 14. Mark your calendars! Set your alarms!
July 8, 2006
Thanks to Mike Zielinski for sending in the score sheet. Scores can be found here. The truth is out!
And a big Cragin Thanks to Dan Zielinski for this year's photos!
"The Cragin" is a nice sounding name for our small little tournament. For 31 years until the brief lackacourse attack we met to renew friendship laughter and tears over our golf games. (lackacourse attack, by the way, is of no relation to the dread Hawaiian disease of lackanookie which at many of our ages is prevalent)
So, last year when we got booted off of our old home course at Hunter, well, maybe burned out, or shut down, or whatever you want to call it, we didn't get to meet and renew and all that fraternal, familial stuff we do. The spirit of Cragin, however, is not something that can easily be kept down or forgotten. Just ask Jimmy Zielinski, who returned this year and for the umptillionth time related his bit of baseball trivia that Tim Mocarski hit the longest homerun in baseball history right there at the back lot of Prosser High School, well at least the longest whiffle ball homer hit in Prosser High School back lot history when he clocked a floating fast ball one-armed with a two foot long plastic bat into a 40 mph wind over Jimmy's head and into the parking lot a half mile away from the diamond. Well, at least that's how Jimmy tells it. Tim doesn't remember anything about the Prosser games expect running into a wall to make a catch on a deep fly of the bat of Sparr, but that was in a fast pitch game with rubber balls and slightly bigger, wooden bats.
The Cragin returned this year to Bristol Oaks Country Club in Bristol, Wisconsin. We were going to perhaps call this year's tournament, "The Cragin Returns"or maybe "The Return of the Cragin,"� but both of those names sounded too much like bad sequels to B monster movies. Are they any A monster movies anymore? Okay, maybe Frankenstein and Godzilla and King Kong, but those are classics. And maybe Alien if for nothing else but that T-shirt scene with Sigourney Weaver at the end. Okay, maybe, too, the Cragin can be called a monster show based on most of our swings.
Moe insisted he was not on steroids after having won the longest drive umbrella. He did offer to submit to testing, but then remembered that czardnina and pierogi sometimes produce positive drug results. He beat out Len Tobiaski by a mere foot. Must be that melon head driver he got last year. Tobiaski had the last laugh by beating Moe by one stroke 83-84.
Moe also was in the running for closest to the pin on the 8th hole. That honor and another umbrella, however, went to ... well, to be honest, Moe doesn't remember since he was still bummed out from having to take four shots to get in the hole from five yards off the green on a par ... twice in the same round!
Moe and Tobie were third in the gross scores this year. Tom Zielinski, who looks nothing like Tom Selleck, shot a blistering 37 on the front nine, cooled off on the back nine and finished with low gross of 80. Nobody asked him to take any drug test, though.
Rich Wojnicki took home the traveling trophy with a low net of 72. Either the handicap system was working perfectly this year or simply Dennis didn't pick the right holes that produced the ridiculously low numbers of past years. Speaking of Dennis, the co-founder of the tournament, was missing in action. Rumor has it that he was under the weather after practicing too much for this year's tournament.
Ever mindful of equal rights and opportunity for everyone, the Cragin once again had a women's division, but it was not hotly contested this year as we had only three female entrants. Jackie Zielinski won low gross and Gail Zielinski won Low Net. When asked if the golfer on her trophy was a woman, Gregg Rossi copped a feel of the trophy and assured us all that it was indeed a female figure. "And she's wearing a very short skirt, too!"� he said. Typical perverts, we men can be sometimes. The women at the table understood this and simply rolled their eyes in that all-knowing look of "We know our Cragin men!"�
Mike Zielinski did an admirable job of filling in for his dad at the presentations of awards and trophies. Every loser, which meant just about everybody, got a hat. Besides the Closest to the Pin and the Longest Drive, the trophy winners also got an umbrella. The trophies were different this year and several people remarked that the golfer on the Low Gross trophy was a remarkable likeness to Dennis, particularly the wrinkled plus fours the guy was wearing. Payne Stewart never looked that bad!
Mike's wife is expecting the first Zielinski grandchild in August. With that, his doctor job, and the side gig of his band Powerknobs (ranked 193,535 on Amazon sales), his golf game showed it. He does say, like most of us these days, that he made the right choice in not becoming a pro golfer.
Moe held off on farting until the 18th green. His playing partners were grateful.
As always, the 2006 Cragin provided us with fun, laughter, and the fellowship of the past and present. Ken Mrock showed up after a few years away of taking care of the grounds for the Bears. He wore a Bears shirt to the tournament, though, and was almost charged double for his green fees by the Packer fan behind the counter. Although he didn't play, Gregg Rossi showed up for the food. He's awaiting surgery in August. Bob Ziaja and his kids and their spouses showed up. The usual Zielinski contingent played, too. Larry the Leach, Woj, Mrock, Moe, Spar, Len and any others I missed here. The usual suspects and Cragin miscreants. We missed some people and relished the ones there. We caught up on old times, with old friends and enjoyed ourselves. As always, the scores we shot didn't really matter. Being with each other did.
Bristol Oaks received great reviews from almost every participant this year, so we'll tee it up there again in 2007 on July 14. Mark your calendars! Set your alarms!
